Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always

There is a book by that title that is one of our favorites. Every time I read it I have to keep myself from crying in front of the kids. The last time I read it, I was snuggled up with Asher in his bed and when I got to the part where the grown up little boy is holding his old mother as he rocks and sings there song to her, I couldn't hold back the tears.

It can be a hard book to read as a mother as you watch this little boy grow up. But no matter how big he gets, his mom always sneaks in his room after he is fast asleep, picks him up to hold in her arms and sings this song "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always as long as I'm living my baby you'll be." In the end the little boy is grown up with a family of his own. After driving to his mom's house, picking her up and singing the song to her as she sleeps, he drives back home, walks into his new baby girl's room and does the same.

I thought about this book this morning as I peaked my head into Bella's room as she slept. She hasn't been feeling well and slept in pretty late this morning. Usually she wakes up before us all and plays with all of her baby dolls and reads her books until she is ready to come out. It's not often anymore that I get to watch her sleep. But this morning, I kept going in to check on her as she slept and slept. I wanted to wake her up so we could spend our morning together while Asher is at school. But I let her sleep, knowing that she needed it. I knew as I watched her little stomach move up and down and listened to her breathe in and out, just like I used to when she was a tiny baby, that there would be plenty of time to wake her up...to watch her grow before my eyes. So this morning, I sat and watched her, I let time stop for just a little bit. Knowing that one day, too soon from now, she will be grown.

This is why I'm choosing to savor time. It may sound silly, it may be a little cheesy even, but for me, as a mom, time is precious. It goes too fast and slips between our fingers even as much as we try to hold onto it as tight as possible.

As time moves forward and Bella becomes even more beautiful, Asher grows more and more into his daddy and we wait to meet this little girl, I choose to close my eyes in these kind of moments, thanking the Lord for the "right now" and holding onto it even if just in a memory. Because the "moments" and "memories" will keep coming. We can let them pass us up or we can live in them and be thankful for them. All of them...including the moments where you think you need a mental vacation to Mexico :)

My sleeping beauty- I am so thankful for you. For the sweet, beautiful girl you are growing into, for the way you wrap your arms around me and say "I love you shhoooo much", I love the way your daddy looks at you and I love to watch your brother take care of you. I love how bossy you are because I know it's for a reason. I love that you are mine. To love forever, to like for always...as long as I'm living my baby you'll always be.

3 comments:

  1. Laura that is one of my favorite books as well., I often think about my Grandma and her relationship with my Dad before he died and when she found out he was going to.It definitely is a genuine tear jerker. I often have those moments too when I just kind of sit there and watch our beautiful blessings from God above. They are so easy to get frustrated with but sooo much easier to cherish. I'm soo glad that our Lord feels this way about us. It gives me strength when I think about the love we have for our children that is so far exceeded by the love our Heavenly Father has for us.. It's what I need to keep on keeping on.:)

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  2. I found you because LMM told me to check out your blog. Can I just say how wonderful it is to find it? I am a woman on a journey of faith myself and I still have a very rocky road ahead of me! Its good to know I am not alone and I can look to you for inspiration :)

    I love this post about your daughter, my daughter is just getting over an illness too, and I totally identify with this post :)

    Take care!!! :)

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